A sad post

This is me being sad. If you don't want to be sad, don't read it.

I've been going to my current ward for nearly a year now. I was never given a calling or assignment or anything which has made me sad. I have a lot to offer. I do go and sing in the choir but that's not a calling. In the about 10 months I've been going to the ward, I had a visiting teacher come twice (December and February) before she moved. After that, I made sure to find out at least one person who was assigned to visit me, and she never did, and now she is moving this week. Last Sunday was a very happy day for me: I had just found out that my petition was approved, it was WARM, and I was finally given a visiting teaching assignment of my own! I was so happy that day, SOO happy!! You don't understand how happy I was last Sunday. Well, Monday night someone decided to turn the AC on at home and I was much less happy. Anyway, all week I was fantasizing about going visiting teaching which was happy thoughts. Today at church I approached my companion so we could plan some stuff and she informed me that we weren't actually companions. She had already gone to the coordinator person and had her daughter be her companion instead. I'm not gonna lie, that was a blow. I thought there was still hope though, that if she had a new companion, then I probably did too! I didn't get to talk to the coordinator person until after Sunday School, and she told me I did not have a new companion. Now that really was a blow. I barely made it through the opening song and prayer in RS without anyone noticing how suddenly sad I was. After church was over I had to work hard not to cry too, until I got home, then I shut myself in my room and lost it. I haven't cried so hard in a loooong time. My kitty was cute, she came and snuggled up next to my arm next to my head and came back to resnuggle every time I got up to blow my nose. But man, I sure cried. Now that I think about it, things that make me cry are often when I get really excited aout something and it gets taken away. Well, that's my sad story. Tomorrow I will be happy again because it's the first day of Science in the Parks. And that won't be cancelled or taken away from me, haHA! I don't like being sad, I also try not to label myself as a victim, and I'm not perfect, but I do wish that I would be made to feel appreciated a bit more often. Crossing my fingers. That is all.